Never Saw It Coming
by WorthlessPleasure
Summary: Even the smallest of fights has big consequences.
1. Preview

The sirens grew louder the longer they drove down the road. They were getting closer. All they could do was hope that he was okay. That he wasn't too hurt. That he wasn't dead.

Finally, he saw the police cars and an ambulance. He saw a few officers looking down into a hole. He jumped out of the car before it stopped and ran to join them. He looked down and saw them placing his friend on a stretcher. His face was a light shade of blue.

He turned to an officer. "What…what happened?" he choked out.

The officer turned to him, a solemn look on his face. "We found his car over there," he pointed to their right, where the car was parked on the side of the road, hazard lights on. "We found him down there, obviously. He was face down in six inches of rainwater, unconscious. If we hadn't found him when we did, he might've died before we could get him to the hospital."

"But he's gonna be okay, right?" he asked, looking back at his friend. He couldn't help but feel guilty. The only thought running through his mind was that _he_ caused this. _He_ was the reason his best friend nearly died. _He_ told his friend to leave, and he did. _He _told his friend to drown in the rain, and he almost did. He felt a tear creep down his cheek. He looked back at the officer, who seemed to be thinking of a way to tell him something bad without making him any more devastated than he was now.

After what seemed like an eternity, the officer sighed. "His chances don't look good."

* * *

**A/N: Alright, that's a preview of my new story, Never Saw It Coming! I promise it'll be good. And no worries, it's not mystery characters like this. I just don't want to reveal what happens to who...**

**Anyway, tell me what you think.**


	2. Chapter 1: The Fight

**A/N: Okay, I'm not going to make this long. Thanks to the reviewers and all of you who are reading. It's finally time to see who our main characters are...**

Rain fell in torrents over Southern California. The water was starting to form large puddles, even though it had only been raining for a few minutes. LA, being in the middle of the group of clouds, got the worst of it. Already, four roads had been blocked off, and the city had received a major flood warning.

Because of this, the guests in the Palm Woods stayed in their rooms. The kids had planned a bonfire jam, but the rain had flooded the pool area, and Bitters took it as an excuse to close the pool for a week so it could be drained (after the rain stopped, of course).

This was why Logan Mitchell had been sitting in the living room of 2J since the middle of the afternoon reading. He would have much rather been lounging in a pool chair, listening to the splashes and screams that often filled the area. He sighed. James and Carlos used the rain as an excuse to sleep all day, and Kendall had left a while ago to meet Jo at the park. Since New Town High was done filming for the season and Big Time Rush was taking a break after their last tour, Kendall and Jo were finally able to go on full dates again. They used it to their full advantage, often spending hours on end just sitting around doing nothing. Why they were meeting in an open area in a storm, he wasn't sure, but he was positive they would eventually drown. Logan wondered how LA would look after a few hours in the current weather.

Personally, Logan didn't mind the rain as long as he was inside. The constant patter of the rain against the window relaxed him. On top of that, the rain was the only noise in the apartment. The calmness of the apartment was unusual, but greatly accepted by the smart boy.

The peace was disturbed when the front door was opened harshly and slammed into the wall, the crash enough to shake the pictures hanging on the wall. Logan's focus was immediately moved to the source of the disturbance, which turned out to be Kendall. His eyes were red and his cheeks were moist, despite the hood that covered his entire face. If Logan didn't know better, he'd say the unspoken leader of the group was crying. He stood and walked to his friend. He inspected Kendall's face closely, the taller boy feeling slightly uncomfortable at the attention. Finally Logan stepped back.

Kendall simply stared at his friend for a moment, a look of confusion on his face. "What was that for?" he asked.

Logan's expression was sympathetic. "Why were you crying?" Kendall opened his mouth to speak, but Logan cut him off. "I know you were crying, so don't try to deny it. Just suck up your pride and tell me what happened."

Kendall was shocked. Logan rarely talked to anyone like that, especially his friends. "I…I…" he sighed. "I don't want to talk about it."

Logan nodded. "Alright, fine. Just tell me later."

Kendall shook his head. "No. I…I want to leave."

Logan was confused. "You want to leave? You mean like on vacation?"

Kendall shook his head again. "No. I want to go home. To Minnesota."

It was Logan's turn to be shocked. "What? Why?"

Kendall sighed. "I just do. I don't want to be here."

Logan looked slightly annoyed. "You don't want to be here? With your friends? Doing something you love?"

Kendall started to get mad. "What makes you think I love this?"

"Oh, I don't know. Maybe the fact that you've been singing since the day I met you, probably even before that," Logan shot back.

"Yeah, well things change!"

"Okay, fine, Kendall. What the hell changed that made you want to leave all of this behind? Huh? Is it us?" he asked, annoyance dripping from the words as he pointed to himself.

"You know what? James and Carlos don't have anything to do with this, but you sure as hell aren't helping me right now!"

"Well, maybe if you would _let_ me help you then-"

"Like you could help me anyway! You can't do _shit_!"

"Okay, you know what? Fine! Go ahead and leave! See if I care!"

"Already half out the door! Any last words before I leave?"

"Yeah, I have a few. Go find the deepest hole you can, crawl in it, and drown in the fucking rainwater."

Hurt flashed for a brief second in Kendall's eyes, which went unnoticed by Logan. The anger returned, and Kendall glared at the shorter boy before turning away from him. Logan didn't say or do anything. He just stood and watched as Kendall grabbed the doorknob and pulled it with him as he stormed back into the hallway of the second floor, the door slamming shut as he walked out far enough. He heard the stomps as Kendall made his way down the hall, not intending to come back. He heard the bang as Kendall punched the elevator button, and another to push the button for the lobby. After a few seconds, he heard the door to the exit of the hotel slam, and could only assume that he was heading towards his car in the parking lot.

Logan threw his hands up and stormed into his room. Despite his anger, he was careful not to make any noise. Carlos may have been a heavy sleeper, but he was positive James had heard the entire argument. However, he didn't want to talk to James about it. He figured Kendall would be back the next day, and they could eventually make up and be friends again and maybe, just _maybe_, Kendall would tell him what was going on.

He was positive he would wake up and Kendall would be in the bed across from his, sound asleep and finally calmed down. He was positive that they would be able to forgive each other and forget they ever fought. He was positive Kendall would return.

He couldn't be farther from the truth.


	3. Chapter 2: The Search, Part I

**A/N: Okay, so before we get to the next part, I just want to thank everyone who's reviewed so far, and a special thanks to Rockport268, who's been giving me a few ideas on some later parts of the story. Speaking of which, on to the second chapter!**

_Beep. Beep. Beep beep. Beep beep beep. Beepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeepbeep._

Logan groaned and rolled onto his stomach. He blindly smacked his hand down on his night stand, missing the blaring alarm clock entirely. He moved his hand around, eventually brushing against the source of the annoying tone. He pressed the off button, and slowly rolled over onto his back. He lied still for a few moments before opening his eyes. He was met with the harsh sunlight, causing him to cover his eyes with his hands. He slowly uncovered them, allowing his eyes to adjust. He sat up and looked over to Kendall's bed, which held a surprising lack of Kendall. Logan shook his head and walked to the bathroom attached to their bedroom. He showered and dressed quickly, then made his way to the living room.

James and Carlos were sitting on the orange couch watching Saturday morning cartoons, the Latino obviously more excited than the pretty boy. Logan walked to his friends and plopped down on the couch next to James. After a few moments James turned to him.

"What was up with you and Kendall last night?"

Logan sighed and looked at the ceiling. "He wanted to go back to Minnesota for some reason."

James gasped, and Carlos turned off the TV and faced the two. "Why?" they said simultaneously.

Logan turned to face his friends. "I don't know. He wouldn't tell me. We started fighting and he just left."

James nodded. "Any ideas where he went?"

Logan shook his head, and the pretty boy sighed. "Alright. I guess we'll just have to wait until he comes back."

The three nodded, and continued their plans for the day, which were pretty much just watching TV since the pool was flooded.

That night, Logan crawled into bed with feelings of guilt twisting knots in his stomach. Kendall had been gone 24 hours. By now, he could be in another state, another country…hell, he could've been abducted by aliens and taken to another galaxy for all he knew. He crawled into bed, silently wishing that Kendall would be back when he woke up. He closed his eyes, and slowly fell into a deep sleep.

* * *

_Logan found himself back in the living room of 2J. The sound of rain violently pounding against the window filled the room. As the rain continued to assault the building, the door was harshly slammed open, and Kendall stormed into the room. He looked angry._

_Logan stepped back, and Kendall stood where he was, fuming. "K-Kendall?"_

_The blonde shook his head and turned around, stomping out of the apartment and slamming the door behind him. The walls shook, and the windows shattered, causing rain to quickly rush in. The water quickly filled the apartment, and Logan became increasingly panicked. He rushed to the door, only to find that he couldn't open it. The water was up to his waist already, and at this rate the entire apartment would be filled in a matter of seconds. He trudged towards the windows, swimming to them when the apartment was flooded enough. The shards of glass from the windows acted as guards, however, and Logan had no way of escaping. By the time he gave up hope of escape, the water had nearly reached the ceiling, giving Logan a small air pocket. When that disappeared, he simply floated near the top of the apartment, the air slowly being sucked from his body. He felt himself fading slowly, the world around him dimming. It got darker, and darker, until eventually he was swallowed by the blackness._

* * *

Logan shot up, breathing heavily. A layer of sweat matted his hair to his forehead, and his shirt to his torso. He took a few moments to catch his breath before glancing at his clock. He still had a few hours before he had to be awake. He let his head fall back onto his pillow, and slowly drifted back into sleep.

Logan's second awakening was a much more welcome one than the first. He hadn't dreamed, and even beat his alarm clock, meaning he didn't have to listen to the irritating beeps that he associated with pure evil. Since it was Sunday, and he hadn't made any plans, he walked into the living room in his pajamas. He was met with James and Carlos wrestling over what appeared to be a box of cereal. Logan laughed as he stepped around the pair and onto the couch, flipping the TV to the music channel, planning on relaxing all day. After a few minutes, James plopped down on the other side of the couch, Carlos jumping over the back and landing next to him. They sat in silence for a while, enjoying their cartoons.

Eventually, James turned to Logan. "Did Kendall come back yet?"

Logan looked down and shook his head. The guilt that made his stomach churn the night before had returned. "I'm worried."

James nodded. "Me too, Logie. Me too."

Carlos sighed. "Should we call the police and report him missing?"

Logan thought for a minute, then slowly nodded his head. "Yeah, I think we should."

Without a word, Carlos stood and walked to the kitchen. He picked up the phone and dialed the number. Logan and James looked at him, wanting to hear the conversation. After a minute, Carlos spoke.

"Yeah, I'd like to report a missing person." Another pause. "His name is Kendall Knight, and he's been gone for about 36 hours."

Logan exhaled sharply, thoroughly exhausted. The police had come to question the boys about Kendall, and said that they would try their hardest to find him. They had found out that airports had no records of a Kendall Knight flying out of LA, and were securing borders around neighboring cities. The police really weren't messing around with this case.

Logan had somehow managed to carry himself to his room, and was able to drag himself to his bed, but after that his energy was sapped. He fell onto his bed, asleep before his head even hit the pillow.

* * *

_It was dark. Logan was somewhere, and it was dark. And wet. It was raining. Funny how all of Logan's dreams were cursed by rain. Well, that's a guilty conscience for you._

"_Hello?" he called out. He didn't really expect an answer, but was definitely hoping for one._

"_Logan?"_

_It was a ghostly echo that sent chills down Logan's spine. He started walking towards where he assumed was the source of the voice, hoping that whatever this dream was about would be explained when he found it. Every so often, the echo would return, and it wasn't reassuring that the echo didn't seem to be getting any closer. Eventually, Logan gave up looking for it and, in a last attempt to find it, turned around. If the voice wasn't getting any closer, it must have been following him. Unfortunately, this wasn't the case, and behind him was the same darkness that surrounded every other side of him. He sighed and took a step forward. Almost immediately he felt himself falling. He screamed out for help, then mentally slapped himself. Nobody could hear him. He was alone except for whatever was calling out his name, and it obviously didn't want to be found. So he simply relaxed and closed his eyes, letting himself fall down further and further._

* * *

_**Beep. Beep. Beep beep. Beep beep beep.**_

Logan opened his eyes. His alarm clock was blaring, and he was tempted to grab a hockey stick and smash it into a million tiny pieces. He slammed his hand down on the clock, managing to press the off button. He slowly rolled over to the edge of his bed and twisted himself so his legs were hanging off the edge. He let himself fall, landing on his feet. He dragged his feet as he walked to the bathroom to shower. He dressed quickly and walked to the living room, where James and Carlos were already awake and talking to the officer in charge of the case, Officer Porter.

"Well boys, we've got the borders secured and some search parties out looking, and we're going to alert the media so we can get the civilians looking as well. We're going to find Kendall."

James and Carlos thanked him, and Logan simply nodded as he left. Even with Officer Porter's reassurance, he was worried Kendall wasn't going to be found. That Kendall was like the voice in his dream.

That Kendall didn't want to be found.


	4. Chapter 3: The Search, Part II

_It has been one week since sixteen-year-old Kendall Knight was reported missing. The Big Time Rush singer was last seen at his Palm Woods apartment late Saturday night with fellow band member Logan Mitchell. The two were reportedly arguing, and Kendall stormed out. No further details have been reported at this time. In other news-_

Logan groaned and fell back into the couch. Ever since the morning after the fight, Logan felt terrible. He had basically told Kendall to go die, and even if the storm last week had passed shortly after he left, he was worried. There was supposed to be another one within the next few days, and the dark grey clouds told him that it was today. Logan couldn't help but feel like it was a sign of imminent danger. Kendall had been missing for seven days, and five of those were spent searching every corner of Los Angeles. So far, they had come up with nothing.

Logan glanced at the clock for the seventh time, something he did when he was anxious about something. 11:57 am. The search party had been out for almost five hours today, and with not much area left to cover, he was sure they would've found something by now. Everybody was desperate at this point, and some were starting to lose hope.

As Logan got lost in his thoughts, rain started to fall lightly on LA. The soft pitter patter of rain against the window calmed Logan. He hadn't been able to sleep in the last two days, and the sound was somehow able to lull him into a deep slumber.

* * *

"_Why were you crying?" Kendall opened his mouth to speak, but Logan cut him off. "I know you were crying, so don't try to deny it. Just suck up your pride and tell me what happened."_

_Kendall was shocked. Logan rarely talked to anyone like that, especially his friends. "I…I…" he sighed. "I don't want to talk about it."_

_Logan nodded. "Alright, fine. Just tell me later."_

_Kendall shook his head. "No. I…I want to leave."_

_Logan was confused. "You want to leave? You mean like on vacation?"_

_Kendall shook his head again. "No. I want to go home. To Minnesota."_

_It was Logan's turn to be shocked. "What? Why?"_

_Kendall sighed. "I just do. I don't want to be here."_

_Logan looked slightly annoyed. "You don't want to be here? With your friends? Doing something you love?"_

_Kendall started to get mad. "What makes you think I love this?"_

"_Oh, I don't know. Maybe the fact that you've been singing since the day I met you, probably even before that," Logan shot back._

"_Yeah, well things change!"_

"_Okay, fine, Kendall. What the hell changed that made you want to leave all of this behind? Huh? Is it us?" he asked, annoyance dripping from the words as he pointed to himself._

"_You know what? James and Carlos don't have anything to do with this, but you sure as hell aren't helping me right now!"_

"_Well, maybe if you would let me help you then-"_

"_Like you could help me anyway! You can't do shit!"_

"_Okay, you know what? Fine! Go ahead and leave! See if I care!"_

"_Already half out the door! Any last words before I leave?"_

"_Yeah, I have a few. Go find the deepest hole you can, crawl in it, and drown in the fucking rainwater."_

_Kendall nodded and walked out, slamming the door behind him. Logan turned and walked towards his room, but stopped. There was water seeping through the bottom of the door. He opened it, and a flood of water poured out, a blue-faced Kendall being carried with it. Suddenly, the entire Palm Woods was crowded behind him. Most were crying, some were angry. Choruses of "this is all your fault" echoed the room as the mob inched closer to Logan, and all he could do was stand as they piled on top of him, suffocating him, killing him…_

* * *

Logan awoke with a start. _Figures,_ he thought. _The first time I fall asleep in two days and I have a nightmare_. He groaned and stood from the couch. His eyes immediately darted to the clock. 12:25. He'd only been asleep half an hour?

Shaking his head, he walked to his room and fell face down on his bed, returning to sleep the moment his head hit the pillow.

* * *

"_Logan? Logan?"_

_Logan knew he was dreaming, because the echo was the same as the one he heard in the dream he had the night after Kendall left. He was walking down a familiar road. He froze for a moment, trying to find out where he was. Unable to remember, he continued walking. Every so often, he heard his name echo from somewhere ahead, but despite the fact that he had been walking for a while, the ghostly voice never seemed to get closer._

_Finally, Logan stopped to assess his surroundings. There were trees on both sides of the road and it was windy, the leaves rustling with every small gust. That and the echo of his name made this dream seem incredibly eerie. Deciding that this was a lost cause, he turned around, half-expecting to wake up when he returned to where the dream started, half-expecting something to be different. As he walked, dark clouds rolled in, and soon rain was pounding against the ground. As he approached the place he started from, the echo he'd been hearing got louder and louder. _Finally,_ he thought to himself._

_Eventually, he returned to the point he started from, and was disappointed to find that he wasn't waking up and the area looked no different than it had when he started. Same road, same trees, same wind, same skid marks…wait, skid marks?_

_Logan followed the black treads down until he saw a car. As he got closer, he recognized it as not just any car. It was Kendall's._

"_Logan?"_

_The voice was a lot louder now, as if it was coming from right next to him. He looked around, but the only thing in sight was the car. Logan continued forward, a feeling of dread settling over him and increasing with every step. Soon, he found himself at the mouth of a large hole. He looked down and found that he couldn't see the bottom. He sighed. _What was all of this for?

"_Logan?"_

_He froze. He was scared, and for two reasons. One, the voice came from inside of the "bottomless" hole. Two, the voice was Kendall's. His first instinct was to call for help, but he knew that nobody would hear him. So he did the next thing that came to mind: he jumped._

_He felt himself falling…and falling…and falling…and falling. After what seemed like an eternity, he began to wonder if the hole was really bottomless. As if to answer his question, the darkness gave way to muddy ground. The sight was bittersweet for Logan. The hole wasn't bottomless and he wouldn't be falling forever, but that meant that he would hit ground. He braced himself for impact. Not wanting to see the ground as it rushed up to meet him, he closed his eyes._

* * *

Logan shot up. He took a quick survey of his surroundings and saw that he was back in his room. He thought more about his dream, continuing to try to remember what that road was.

His thoughts were interrupted by Carlos rushing into his room and grabbing his wrist. Before he could realize what was going on and react, the Latino was dragging him out of the room at an almost breakneck pace. Finally, his brain caught up to the situation. "Carlos, where are you taking me?"

By then they had reached the lobby. "Well, Kelly called and said that the really cool dudes in the awesome black outfits found Kendall's car over on Camisado Road," Carlos said in one breath.

Logan took a minute to go over what Carlos said, trying to break the paragraph that Carlos rushed into manageable pieces. _Camisado Road…?_ His mind flashed back to his dream. _That was the road in my dream!_ Suddenly, the rest of Carlos' words clicked. They found Kendall's car.

_They found Kendall._

* * *

**A/N: Okay, so that's chapter 3. I don't know when I'm going to update next, because I still haven't written the next chapter. I'll try and get it up within the next week. Until then, reviews desired. *hint, hint***


	5. Chapter 4: The Recovery

**A/N: Okay, just a quick little note. I changed my pen name (again), so if that helps any confusion you may have had… Oh, and a quick shout out to my good friend FinellaFantasy. She only has one story, and it's an HSM/Glee crossover (not my style), but hey, if you want to read it, go ahead. And be sure to tell her to stop procrastinating and keep writing.**

Logan let the news sink in. _They found Kendall's car. They found Kendall._ He felt relief wash over him. However, it was short lived. For all anyone knew, he had ditched his car. Or worse, he was…

No. Logan wouldn't let himself think that Kendall wasn't alive. Even if he wasn't with his car, he could still be okay. The reassurance was enough for him to calm down.

"Uhh…Logan? You there, buddy?"

Logan snapped back into reality to find a very worried looking Carlos snapping his fingers in front of his face. He nodded. "I'm fine, Carlos."

The Latino smiled and immediately dragged Logan to the Big Time Rush mobile. He all but threw Logan into the passenger seat before jumping in the back, James already occupying the driver's seat. As soon as he was sure everybody was buckled in, James sped out of the Palm Woods parking lot and onto the freeway.

After a few minutes, James took the off ramp toward Camisado Road. A few moments later, the sound of sirens could be faintly heard.

"Wow, his car must not be far from the freeway," Carlos said.

Logan turned to look at him. "Carlos, this road is like a mile long. It'd be pretty hard to get far from the freeway."

Carlos shrugged. "I was just saying."

The sirens grew louder the longer they drove down the road. They were getting closer. All they could do was hope that he was okay. That he wasn't too hurt. That he wasn't dead.

Finally, they saw the police cars and an ambulance. They saw a few officers looking down into a hole. Logan jumped out of the car before it stopped and ran to join them. He looked down and saw them placing Kendall on a stretcher. His face was a light shade of blue.

He turned to an officer. "What…what happened?" he choked out.

The officer turned to him, a solemn look on his face. "We found his car over there," he pointed to their right, where the car was parked on the side of the road, hazard lights on. "We found him down there, obviously. He was face down in six inches of rainwater, unconscious. If we hadn't found him when we did, he might've died before we could get him to the hospital."

"But he's gonna be okay, right?" Logan asked, looking back at his friend. He couldn't help but feel guilty. The only thought running through his mind was that _he_ caused this. _He_ was the reason his best friend nearly died. _He_ told his friend to leave, and he did. _He _told his friend to drown in the rain, and he almost did. He felt a tear creep down his cheek. He looked back at the officer, who seemed to be thinking of a way to tell him something bad without making him any more devastated than he was now.

After what seemed like an eternity, the officer sighed. "His chances don't look good."

Guilt washed over Logan in a new wave, and it took all of his strength to not break down right then. He felt himself being squeezed between two people, and knew that James and Carlos were trying to keep him from losing it. So far, it was working.

Eventually, the paramedics got Kendall out of the hole. The three boys couldn't help but notice that he was eerily still and his face was stained blue. It almost looked like he was dead. Logan could've easily broken down at the sight had he been alone. But somehow, his friends being next to him gave him strength. He watched as they loaded his friend into the ambulance and drove back toward the freeway. Soon, they walked to their car and followed.

It was a silent drive the entire way to the hospital. When they arrived, they walked to the reception desk, and one of them managed to choke out "Kendall Knight," although none of them were really sure who.

The receptionist's fingers glided across the keyboard, the sound of her nails clicking against the keys filling the empty lobby. Finally, she turned to them. "He's in room 505. Now I want-" the boys raced off before she could finish. She shook her head. "Teenagers," she said, laughing.

The three boys had somehow managed to not break anything—or any_body_—on their way to Kendall's room, but nearly crashed into a doctor on their arrival. They all gave hurried apologies before rushing into the room.

They found Kendall in much the same state he was in before. His skin was still stained blue—although it was starting to return to its normal color—and he was still unconscious. He was, however, breathing normally, which was relieving at least a little to the trio, especially Logan, who until that point was preparing himself for the worst.

As they stood, looking at their friend, the door silently opened and closed. The three turned to find the doctor they nearly crushed standing before them. The doctor simply nodded before walking past them to Kendall's bed. He quickly scanned all of the machinery, occasionally writing something down on what the boys could only assume was Kendall's chart. Finally, he turned back to them. "Your friend is going to be fine. We're not sure exactly how long he'll be out. We think that he might have jumped into the hole when it was fuller. If that's the case, then his lungs will have to drain out before he can really do anything. Other than that, there's not much to say. For a drown victim, he's doing pretty well."

The three laughed slightly before falling silent. "That's Kendall," James remarked.

The doctor smiled and nodded, slowly walking toward the door. He turned back. "If you need anything, I'm Dr. Finnel."

The boys thanked him and he left. As soon as the door was closed, they turned their attention back to Kendall. Carlos sighed. "This doesn't make any sense." Logan and James turned to look at them, their expressions telling him to explain. "I mean, the police and the doctor said he jumped into a hole full of water and let himself sink. Why would he do that? It's like he wanted to die." James nodded in agreement, and Logan looked at his feet, silently praying that his friends wouldn't notice it was out of guilt. "Logie, what's wrong?" Of course, fate decided to mock him. Again.

He sighed. "When…when Kendall came home…before he left, we…we sort of got into an argument."

"So? That's no reason to-"

"I'm not done. We got into an argument. We were both really mad and I don't know. I…I said something I shouldn't have."

"What did you say?"

"I told him he could drown in a hole." James slapped him in the shoulder. "Ow! I didn't think he'd take me seriously!"

James sighed. "Yeah, I guess it was just the heat of the moment. At least he's gonna be alright."

"Yeah," Logan said, guilt lacing his voice. "At least."

**Alright, that's chapter 4. Sorry about the delay. I would've had this up sooner, but my dad's been in and out of the hospital, and his birthday was yesterday, so I didn't really get a chance to write. Oh, well. No worries. Kendall's going to be awake next chapter. Just so you know, the story's not about Kendall recovering. It's about Kendall's and Logan's friendship pretty much shattering. Just a little side note. Okay, until next time!**


	6. Chapter 5: The Hospital

**Okay, so I'm dedicating this chapter to Promise99. Kinda late, but her reviews always make me smile. Okay, so on to the story.**

The boys arrived at the hospital the next morning and walked into Kendall's room quietly, in case he was still asleep. They were pleasantly surprised to find that Kendall was awake. He was talking with Dr. Finnel about something, and they quickly discovered they walked in at the end of the conversation when the doctor nodded and turned away. He acknowledged the boys, then left them alone with their friend.

Kendall smiled. "Hey James," he croaked. The pretty boy smiled and waved. "Carlos." The Latino simply nodded, a slightly worried expression still plastered on his face. The blonde turned to Logan, then quickly turned away when their eyes met, effectively crushing Logan's already low self-esteem, as well as boosting his already excessive guilt. This didn't go unnoticed by the other two of the group.

"Kendall," James said. "Logan already feels bad enough about all this. Ignoring him is just going to crush him even more."

Kendall simply shrugged and looked at the ceiling, not wanting to continue this conversation. James and Carlos simply shook their heads and each slung an arm over Logan's shoulders. Logan was on the verge of a breakdown, and didn't want to give Kendall the satisfaction of seeing it. He shrugged off his friends' arms and was out the door before any of them could react.

The two immediately turned to Kendall, glaring. The blonde just shrugged and turned away from them. James and Carlos simply shook their heads and left to find Logan.

The pair found him outside, sitting on the curb. Just a glance would tell you that he was crying. They sat down on either side of the brunette, wrapping their arms around his shoulders. They sat for a few minutes, letting Logan spill his emotions. Soon, they were interrupted by a familiar voice.

"Logan? James? Carlos?" They boys looked up to find Officer Porter. They smiled. "Have you guys been in to see Kendall yet? We still haven't had a chance to question him." The boys nodded and stood up. They walked into the hospital and toward their friend's room, Logan lagging slightly, wanting to delay seeing Kendall as long as possible. The guilt was already eating him alive, and Kendall's anger wasn't helping in the least.

But fate _still_ wasn't on his side, and before he knew it he was staring at Kendall, who turned his gaze away from the door the moment Logan walked through it. The brunette sighed and sat down on the floor. James and Carlos sat down on either side of him, fully intent on comforting him. Officer Porter grabbed a chair and pulled it to the foot of the bed. "Mr. Knight, I'm Officer Porter. Is it alright if I ask you a few questions?"

Kendall sighed. "Sure."

Officer Porter nodded. "Alright. First off, we found you in the bottom of a hole. You were face down in 6 inches of water, unconscious. You could've died. What exactly were you doing down there?"

Kendall looked at Logan for the first time, glaring. "Listening to my _ex_-best friend."

The pain Logan felt at the "ex" was greater than any other pain he had felt in his life. He almost felt like he would break again, but forced himself to stay strong, if for no other reason than to keep Kendall's ego from growing.

Officer Porter nodded, dissatisfied with the response. "Okay. So what happened after you left the Palm Woods?"

"I drove around for a couple days. I _wanted_ to get out of LA, but I heard the borders were sealed because the police were looking for me. So I just went to Camisado Road. I was going to just leave LA on foot, but I saw the hole full of water, and it just seemed so _perfect_."

"So you jumped into a hole just because it seemed perfect?" Logan suddenly shouted. "Just because I told you to do it, you did it?"

The room fell silent. The tension rose exponentially after Logan's outburst, and no one could find the right thing to say. Finally, Kendall spoke up. "So what if I did? It's not like _you_ care. _You're_ the one who told me to go die in the first place!"

"You think I don't know that, Kendall? Do you _honestly_ think I don't know that? For the past week, the guilt has been eating me alive. I had no idea if you were okay. And you know what? It scared me. For a long time, I was _scared_. Scared that you had listened to me when I had no idea what I was saying and that you did something incredibly stupid. For all I knew, you could've been dead. And in fact, you almost _were_ dead, Kendall. But you can't seem to understand that because you're too busy blaming me for _your _actions."

At this point, he was fuming, and James and Carlos were shocked. Logan rarely ever shouted, and when he did, it was never directed at his friends. Yet here he was, exploding at Kendall, who seemed to be just as shocked as his friends. Before anybody could say anything, Logan stormed out of the room. The silence that followed was extremely awkward, and was only broken by a chair scraping against the floor as Officer Porter stood.

"Well, I think I have everything I need. If any of you guys need me, you know where to call," Officer Porter said. With that, he left. The rest of the boys sat in silence for a long time, each still processing what had just happened.

Kendall saw where Logan was coming from. He knew deep down that Logan was right, and that this was all stupid and that they should just get over it and be friends. But his pride got the better of him. No matter how guilty Logan felt, or how worried he was, that didn't change what he said. Kendall's prideful nature was not what anyone needed right now, and he knew that, but it was fueling his anger and clouding his judgment, and all he saw was Logan screaming at his to drown in a hole. Ultimately, Kendall was more pissed now than he was when he left 2J a week ago.

And nobody could guess how long that would last.

**Okay, so I'm sorry this came late. I planned to have this up Saturday, but I spent this past weekend with my grandparents, so I didn't have a lot of time to write. On top of that, my laptop is falling apart, so I'm trying not to overuse it. No worries, I'll try my best to get the next chapter up this weekend. Until then, reviews appreciated.**


	7. Chapter 6: The Damage

**Alright, so this story has two, maybe three chapters left… I don't know yet. Oh, and a few people pointed out that I don't have disclaimers. I think we all know that a 14-year-old doesn't own BTR. Okay, on to the story.**

A week had passed since Kendall had been found, and he had been released from the hospital. He was told to stay in his apartment and not do any strenuous activity for a few days. Of course, being Kendall, he decided to run around the Palm Woods, pulling pranks on the residents with James and Carlos. His disobedience was further fueled by Logan's constant warnings that over-exercising with a collapsed lung could do serious damage.

Logan was getting fed up with Kendall's attitude. He had tried apologizing every day since Kendall was found, but Kendall didn't listen. Instead, the blonde made sure he was never in the same room as Logan for longer than necessary. Of course, this plan only worked during the day, and during the night he had to fall asleep before Logan or have to deal with him more.

James and Carlos noticed Kendall's avoidance and were equally as irritated as Logan. All they wanted was for Kendall to wake up and realize how stupid he was being. Then maybe their group would return to normal and they could all be happy again.

Kendall was sitting on the orange couch when the door opened and closed. He turned to find Logan walking into the apartment, and stood to move to his room.

"Kendall, would you _not _avoid me for two seconds? I need to say something."

Kendall sighed and sat back down. "What?" he asked, bitterness blatant in his voice.

Logan silently cheered. Kendall was finally listening to him. "Kendall, look. I'm sorry for what I said, alright? I really am."

"Yeah, sure. Whatever," Kendall said, standing up again. He walked toward his room, but stopped when he heard a scoff. He turned back to Logan. "What?"

"Kendall, would you let go of your pride for once? I said I was sorry. Why won't you listen to me?"

"Because the last time I listened to you, I nearly died. Because 'sorry' doesn't fix every goddamn problem. God, for a genius, you are so _naïve_." Kendall turned back to his room and walked in, slamming the door behind him.

Logan sighed. As much as he wanted to fix his and Kendall's friendship, Kendall was right. It would take a lot more than sorry to repair a problem that almost ended in death. He plopped down on the couch and turned on the TV. He didn't pay any attention to what was on, however, because fatigue from loss of sleep from the week Kendall went missing. He quickly let his exhaustion take over, and soon he was in a deep sleep.

* * *

Logan awoke to the sound of the front door closing a little too loudly. He turned to the source, which turned out to be a dripping wet Carlos and James. They looked at him apologetically before heading to the kitchen to get food. Logan turned to the clock and discovered that it was only a little after noon. He was pleasantly surprised at how early it was. He turned back to his friends. "Make me something, please."

James scoffed. "Why can't you make it yourself?"

"Because I'm too lazy."

The boys laughed, and James and Carlos gave in. They spent five minutes making sandwiches, then walked into the living room. They gave Logan his food, and ate quickly, the sound of the TV that hadn't been turned off the only noise in the apartment.

Finally, Carlos spoke. "Where's Kendall?"

Logan, with a mouth full of food, pointed at his room, and the Latino nodded before returning his attention to his lunch, which had almost completely disappeared.

When they were done, Logan stood and walked to his room, where he found Kendall fast asleep. He laughed before moving to his own bed, letting sleep take over once again when he arrived.

While Logan slept, Kendall sighed. He had resorted to pretending to be asleep when the brunette walked in so he wouldn't have to talk to him. While he did feel guilty, he kept telling himself that Logan deserved it. Friends don't tell you to kill yourself, they try to help you. What Logan did that night wasn't helping. In fact, it just drove him further off the edge.

And Kendall Knight was not one to just let things go.

**A/N: Sorry for the shortness, but I'm having writer's block and my mind is in like twelve places at once. If you guys don't look at my profile (which you should), I'm working on two other stories. One will be written as soon as this story is done, and the other…I don't know yet. Anyway, reviews appreciated.**


	8. Chapter 7: The Reparation

**Okay, so I got serious inspiration right after I uploaded the last chapter, and I didn't feel right until I finished this. So here it is, 4 days earlier than I thought I'd have it up!**

Pride is a strong emotion. It protects us from getting hurt. But it has a tendency to spin out of control. It clouds judgment, and in the process of saving ourselves from harm, we end up hurting those around us.

Kendall was living proof. He had kept himself from the pain of betrayal, the ache of guilt, but at the same time forced them upon Logan. He had also blinded himself from what he was doing to his bandmate. Just the word "bandmate" was proof. Kendall and Logan couldn't even really be called friends anymore.

* * *

Kendall was sitting on the couch when James walked into the living room. The taller boy sat down on the couch and looked at his friend, a serious expression on his face. "Kendall, we need to talk."

Kendall sighed. "If this is about Logan, then you can stop talking. I'm not forgiving him yet."

James nodded. "Well, that's progress. You've gone from not forgiving him _at all_ to not forgiving him _yet_." He smiled.

Kendall laughed. "Yeah, well don't get your hopes up. For all anyone knows, I'll forgive him when we're dying."

James' smile fell. "You can't _possibly_ hold a grudge that long, Kendall."

"Yeah, you're probably right."

"So you will forgive him eventually?"

Kendall sighed. "I don't know. I mean, it's not that I don't believe him, because I do. It's just…I don't want to let my guard down and have it happen again. I mean, I got hurt enough that day."

"Yeah, we can tell. Your best friend told you to go die."

"Yeah, and on top of that, there was–" Kendall stopped himself.

"And there was…what, Kendall?" James asked, concern clear on his face.

Kendall shook his head. "Nothing, James. It's just…nothing."

James nodded. "Alright, but if you need anyone to talk to, we're here for you."

Kendall nodded, and James left the apartment, presumably to go down to the pool. Kendall sighed and went back to the couch.

A few minutes passed in complete silence, and Kendall was slightly calmed by the peace. However, memories of the night he left kept popping into his thoughts, reminding him of his anger with Logan. This wasn't helped in the least when Logan interrupted his thoughts.

"Kendall, can I talk to you for a sec?"

Kendall rolled his eyes. "Sure, but don't expect me to listen."

Logan sighed. "Look. I don't care what you think. I'm going to say it. I'm-"

Kendall cut him off. "I swear to God if you say you're sorry I will leave and never come back."

"You already tried that. It didn't work."

"Yeah, well, I can make sure that it'll work this time."

Logan sighed and felt himself sadden immensely. Kendall would rather kill himself than accept an apology. Some 'leader' he was turning out to be. "Fine. Don't accept my apology. But I'd hate to see what Katie would do if she were involved in this."

Kendall felt himself grow angrier. That was a low blow. "Figures you'd bring my little sister into this, Logan." Before the argument could continue, Kendall stood up and stormed into his room.

* * *

It was hours before Logan and Kendall were even in the same room. Even then, it was because Logan had cornered Kendall in their bedroom. He was determined to get _something_ out of Kendall.

"Are you going to accept my apology yet?"

Kendall laughed. "Not now, not tomorrow, not in a year, not in the _afterlife_."

Logan sighed. "Just tell me this then. Why did you leave in the first place? I mean, everyone here _loves_ you. The three of us are like brothers to you. Why would you even think of leaving?"

"Because one of my 'brothers' told me I should."

"Kendall—"

Before he could get another word out, the blonde stood and walked to him. Without a word, he grabbed the collar of Logan's shirt and threw him away from the door before walking out of it.

"This is going to be a lot harder than I thought," Logan said to himself. He sighed and collapsed onto his bed, meeting slumber almost immediately.

* * *

The next morning, Kendall found himself awakening on the couch. It took him a moment to remember what happened the night before, and when he did, he couldn't help but feel guilty. He was still pushing Logan away because he thought the brunette hated him.

_I mean, everyone here _loves_ you_…

Kendall knew that was a lie. If only the others did.

"Kendall, can…can I talk to you?" _Logan_.

Kendall silently stood and started walking toward his room. He didn't need to deal with Logan right now. But Logan was almost as persistent as Kendall.

"Look, Kendall, I—"

"Logan, don't." Kendall needed to think. He didn't need _another_ apology from Logan.

"No, Kendall. I have to. I'm fucking _sorry_ I told you to go drown in a hole. I seriously didn't mean a word I said. I was pissed, and you got the full force of it."

His words shocked Kendall. The blonde turned around. "So…you weren't ever mad at me?"

"Kendall, you're my _best friend_. We've known each other since we were this tall," he brought his hand to his knee, "and not once have I ever been mad at you for more than five seconds." Kendall smiled a sad smile. Logan was right. They had known each other since they were four, and neither one of them ever was mad at each other as long as he was now. "So…do you forgive me now?" Logan finished.

Instead of answering, he pulled Logan into a hug. Logan smiled and returned it, and it wasn't very long before two more sets of arms were wrapped around the pair.

The four pulled apart. Carlos spoke first. "Is everything back to normal?" Despite the hug, he couldn't be completely sure.

"Yeah, it is," Kendall said. Relief and peace washed over all four members, as if they were only truly calm when they were all friends.

Satisfied with the resolution of their conflict, James and Carlos went back to their rooms. Kendall and Logan lingered in the living room. There was still something bugging Kendall, and Logan somehow picked up on that. Before he could ask about it, however, Kendall spoke up.

"Did you expect me to try and commit suicide?"

The question shocked Logan. "Why are you asking me this?"

"Because I'm curious," he said, as if it was overly obvious. "Did you expect it?"

Logan sighed. "Never saw it coming."

"Yeah, neither did I."

Now Logan was confused. "So why did you do it?"

Kendall sighed. As much as he didn't want to talk about it, he felt he had to. "Well…"

**A/N: Aw, a cliffhanger! Okay, so next chapter is the last chapter, but you finally get the explanation. Again, thanks to Rockport268 for the ideas. They really helped me out. And I was able to take an idea and twist it a bit. So next chapter's for you. Until then, reviews appreciated.**


	9. Chapter 8: The Reason

Kendall was sitting at Palm Woods Park. It was pouring, and he was afraid he would drown if he stayed out too long. But he needed to talk to his girlfriend. So there he stood, letting the downpour soak through his skin and drench his bones.

Finally, he saw Jo walking toward him. He smiled, but it wasn't a happy smile. This wasn't a happy thing.

"Kendall, I got your text. What's up?"

He sighed. "Um…listen, Jo, this isn't hard to say, but—"

"Kendall, are you saying what I think you're saying?"

"Yeah. Jo, I think we need to break up."

Jo sighed angrily. Nobody broke up with her. She was _Josephine Taylor_. She was beautiful. She was an actress. And she was a damn good person. But when she was angry…

"Kendall, you _cannot_ be serious."

"Jo, you and I both know that this relationship has gone downhill since your show took off. I mean, for the last few months we've spent half our time fighting. I just…don't think it's gonna work out."

Jo shook her head. "Kendall, do you remember a few weeks ago, when a fight got a little out of hand and you hit me?" Kendall nodded, afraid of where this was going. "Well, I promised I'd keep it to myself because I was your girlfriend and I loved you."

Suddenly, Kendall became nervous. "You…you wouldn't—"

"Kendall, if you break up with me, I won't be your girlfriend anymore. I don't know if I'll be able to keep that promise anymore."

"Jo, this is _exactly_ why I want to break up with you. Ever since you became a star, you've been nothing but a manipulative little _bitch_!"

Something in Jo snapped. "You know what, Kendall. I _might _have said it was just a little slap that didn't do any damage. I _might_ have even said you did it just as a teasing little tap. But _now_…now I'm going to say you did it a lot. You gave me bruises. You belittled me. You acted like we were the "it" couple in Hollywood when the cameras flashed, but when we were alone..." Jo let out a fake sob. "When we were alone all you did was hurt me. Then you dumped me because I wouldn't give it up to you." She sobbed again, then smiled evilly. "It's your choice, Kendall. You can stay with me, and nothing will get out, or you can leave me, and that little story will be a front page headline tomorrow morning."

Kendall sighed. Jo's smile grew. She had him.

"Fuck you, Jo."

Her smile fell. "Wh-what?"

"You heard me. Go ahead, tell your little story. By the time it makes the news, I'll be back in Minnesota and away from your sorry ass."

Jo looked saddened for a moment, but quickly composed herself. "Fine. Have it your way Kendall." She turned back towards the Palm Woods, and stood for a moment. "Sucks that Big Time Rush will be crushed before they even get a real taste of fame. I wonder how James will feel about that."

Jo laughed and walked back to the Palm Woods, leaving Kendall alone to think in the rain.

"I hate you so much right now, Jo," he said to nothing.

As much as he wanted to believe otherwise, he knew Jo was right. If that story got out, Big Time Rush would be over. Nobody would want to buy their albums anymore if they thought Kendall was abusive and only wanted sex. They'd hate him and BTR. His heart fell. James' dream was to become famous. That wouldn't happen if Kendall was involved. He needed to leave for the sake of his friend's dream. He sighed and walked back to the Palm Woods, hoping that he could get in and out without being noticed.

Unfortunately, things don't always work out as planned.

Kendall stormed into 2J, taking his anger towards Jo out on the door. He hoped that nobody was home, but of course, Logan was sitting on the couch, reading. He tried to avoid talking to him, but of course Logan was too caring for his own good. They fought, and it ended with Kendall storming out of the Palm Woods and taking his mom's rental car. He didn't know where he was going, but he sure as hell wasn't going to stay in LA. His friends would do fine without him. They all had the talent, and Gustavo liked them better anyway. It'd be easy to find a replacement, and then James could live out his dream. Kendall could only hope that they would focus on that instead of finding him, especially since he didn't want to be found.

Of course, he was wrong.

Since that Saturday afternoon, Kendall felt his life was starting to fall apart. He lost his girlfriend, abandoned his friends, and was about to have his reputation crushed. Life couldn't get any worse for him.

But, luckily for Kendall, things worked out. He got his friends back. Jo was back in Connecticut. After a blowout with the producers, she was dropped from New Town High and replaced with someone nicer. Her credibility went down the drain, and even if she had told her story, it was doubtful anyone would believe her.

So yeah, Kendall had dealt with some bumps in the road. But it was good to know that his life was back on track. And this time around, he wasn't going to let one insignificant person change that.

**A/N: Alright, that's it for this story. Thanks to all of you for reading, and thanks to the reviewers. Hope you all enjoyed the story, and look out for my next one in the next few weeks. Until then.**


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